Carbs to Avoid for Adults Over 50

 Written by WebMD Editorial ContributorsMedically Reviewed by Melinda Ratini, MS, DO

When you were a kid, you might’ve wanted pizza, cheeseburgers, and ice cream for every meal. And as a young adult, maybe you scraped by on heavily salted instant noodles, rice, and beans. But as you get older, what you eat plays an extra important role in your overall health.

Diet fads come and go. Low-fat this and sugar-free that line the shelves. Yet one of the largest and most important parts of a healthy diet for adults over 50 is the often misunderstood carbohydrate.

What Are Carbs?

They can be your friend or enemy, especially when you’re older than 50.‌

Good carbs, bad carbs. Carbs are naturally in many foods, such as fruits, veggies, and grains. These are often called “good" carbs. They’re also added as sugars or starches to processed foods, such as sodas, chips, and candy. These are called “bad" carbs.

Processed foods that have bad carbs are the worst for your health. They overload your body with extra sugar, starch, and other unhealthy stuff. By choosing natural alternatives, you’re giving your body healthier amounts of sugar, starch, and fiber.

What carbs do. Good carbs have many jobs, including:

Giving you energy

Lowering your chances of getting health problems like heart disease, obesity, and diabetes

Helping you control your weight

Numbers and Carbs

Good carbs should make up about half of your daily calories. Processed foods with bad carbs are "empty" calories that lack nutrients. They don’t give you the health benefits of good carbs. To keep track of your numbers, read the "Nutrition Facts" on your food labels.

Following a healthy diet after 50 doesn’t need to involve number crunching and avoiding carbs completely. Simply being mindful of where your carbs come from can make a big difference.

Benefits of Choosing Good Carbs

Diet and nutrition. As you get older, a balanced diet helps you stay healthy. Since carbs make up about half your diet, good carbs are the key to a healthy eating plan.

Healthy eating habits can:

Help your body’s defenses, or immune system

Help you stay at a healthy weight

Lower your odds for conditions like diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and bone loss

Good nutrition may also:

Boost your focus, alertness, and memory

Lower the risk of Alzheimer’s disease

Lift your mood

Improve the appearance of your skin and hair

Carbs to Avoid, Plus Better Bets

Sugary drinks, sodas, and fruit juices. These often have added sugar. You can replace them with sparkling seltzer water that has real fruit juice or with lightly sweetened teas.

White bread. Simply substitute your normal sandwich bread for a whole-grain or whole-wheat option.

Pasta. Like bread, opt for the whole-grain or whole-wheat types of your favorite pasta. Or use vegetables like zucchini and squash to make “veggie noodles”.

French fries and potato chips. Even fat-free and low-sodium chips are packed with bad carbs. Chips made from sweet potatoes or black beans can be a healthier option. You can also make a variety of veggie chips at home.

Cookies, cakes, and pastries. You probably won’t be shocked to know that the amount of sugar and butter in most baked goods is bad for you. Try satisfying your sweet tooth with fresh, frozen, or dried fruit.

Candy, chocolate, and ice cream. As with baked goods, fresh fruit is a good substitute for these types of junk food.

White rice. It’s not as bad as other processed foods, but it’s not as healthy as whole-grain alternatives like brown rice or quinoa.

Flavored yogurts. It takes a bit of extra work, but adding fresh or frozen fruit to your favorite plain yogurts will cut out a lot of the bad carbs that are in flavored yogurts.

Sugary cereals. Most of these have a lot of bad carbs. Consider replacing sugary cereals with natural, whole-grain versions. Or switch to unprocessed oatmeal with fresh fruit.

Shop Carefully

Even when you’re thinking about buying food that’s labeled “low fat” or “sugar free,” always double-check the Nutrition Facts to understand what you’re getting. Choose a natural alternative when you’re considering a low-fat or sugar-free option.

Sources

‌Harvard Health Publishing: “The smart way to look at carbohydrates.”

HelpGuide: “Eating Well as You Age.”

Houston Methodist: “Don’t Be Fooled by Low-Fat Foods.”

Mayo Clinic: “Carbohydrates: How carbs fit into a healthy diet.”

MemorialCare: “You Don't Have to Abandon Carbs in 2019.”

Breakfast Mistakes

 Skipping It

We all breeze past the breakfast table once in a while. But if you do it every morning, it may raise your chances of health problems like high blood cholesterol, heart disease, and type 2 diabetes. It might even make some people more likely to smoke. But a balanced morning meal can lower those risks and give you the energy to have a great day.

Not Eating Enough

If your stomach’s still growling after a bite-sized breakfast, you may be more likely to overeat or snack on junk food later in the day -- and that could lead to extra pounds. A filling morning meal may have the opposite effect. It fires up your metabolism, which helps you burn calories throughout the day.

Wolfing It Down

When you’re in a rush to start your day, you might scarf your breakfast down in a hurry, too. Some studies link speedy eating with higher odds of obesity, but this needs more research. If you can slow down and savor each bite of breakfast, it could make you more aware of whether you’re actually hungry or not -- and that can help you avoid overeating.

Skimping on Protein

A protein-packed breakfast benefits more than your muscles. It may also help you keep your appetite in check later in the day. But that’s not a green light to load your plate with bacon and sausage. Choose leaner options that are better for your heart, like nut butters, turkey bacon, cottage cheese, Greek yogurt, or milk. Skim and 1% milk have the least amount of fat.

Canceling Carbs

Don’t cut them out completely. Just choose wisely. “Complex carbs” give you steady energy throughout the day. Some good ones are steel-cut oats, fresh fruit, a low-sugar granola bar, or a whole-grain cereal or bagel. “Simple carbs,” on the other hand, could make your energy crash in the afternoon. Avoid ones like greasy hash browns, pancakes, or waffles made with white flour, and sugary fruit juice.

Passing Up Healthy Fats

Unsaturated fats are actually good for you. To make them part of your breakfast, add nuts or seeds to yogurt, or spread nut butter on whole-grain toast or an apple. Omega-3 fats are heart-smart, too. An easy way to get them is to mix ground flaxseed into your cereal. Cut back on saturated fats, though, because they raise your cholesterol. Limit ones like butter, whole or 2% milk, and breakfast pastries.

Excluding Eggs

Egg whites are a prime source of protein and other nutrients. And even the yolks are OK for some of us in moderation, because they’re packed with protein, vitamin D, and eye-friendly antioxidants. What about the cholesterol, though? If you’re healthy, you can have one whole egg a day. You’ll probably need to have far fewer than that if you have diabetes or heart disease, or if you’re at risk for heart problems. Check with your doctor.

Super-Sizing Your Cereal

If you’re filling your bowl, you might be eating too much. Before you pour, check the nutrition label on the side of the cereal box. Look for the recommended serving size, and stick to that amount -- you can use a measuring cup to get it right. Choose brands that are full of fiber and short on sugar, too.

Compromising Your Coffee

Lots of popular flavor boosters make your morning joe brim with extra calories. But there are plenty of ways to lighten your mug. You can sweeten your coffee with a bit of stevia instead of sugar. Agave nectar has more calories than white sugar, but since it's sweeter, you might use less of it. Add low- or no-fat milk instead of cream and whole milk. If you want to give it some extra kick, sprinkle in some cinnamon, nutmeg, or cardamom.

Drinking the Wrong Juice

Your a.m. glass of OJ may be swimming with the sweet stuff because many brands of fruit juice have added sugar. The main way to avoid the empty calories is to make sure the label says 100% juice on it. You could also dilute your drink with water. For toast nutrition, choose whole fruit over juice. It has more fiber, less sugar, and fewer calories.

Waving Off Water

By the time you wake up, it’s probably been hours since you’ve hydrated. That makes a cool glass of H2O the ideal drink to wash your breakfast down. It’ll help you fill up without costing you a single calorie. It may help you think more clearly and shake off a grumpy waking-up mood, too.

Settling for a So-So Smoothie

Smoothies can be healthy -- if you make them with the right stuff. Using a lot of fruit can fill your cup with calories, so stick to one or two servings of it. Boost the nutrition with dark-green veggies like spinach, kale, or bok choy. Add some protein with low-fat yogurt, wheat germ, nut butters, or ground flaxseed. Instead of thinning your smoothie with sugary juice, try unsweetened almond milk, green tea, or ice.

Buying the Wrong Breakfast Bars

Check the nutrition label. The amount of added sugar, saturated fat, and sodium in a store-bought bar may surprise you. If it makes up your entire breakfast, choose ones that have whole-food ingredients, 10-14 grams of protein, and 5 grams of fiber. Remember that a bar can be a handy meal replacement when you’re in a rush, but a balanced meal to start the day is always the healthier choice.

Getting Sabotaged by Sugary Yogurt

Many commercial brands have lots of the sweet stuff -- especially kinds that come with added flavors or fruit already in them. Your best bet is to buy plain, low-fat, or no-fat yogurt. Then jazz it up with your own mixers, like berries, a sprinkle of cinnamon or vanilla, or a drop of honey or agave nectar.

How to Bond with Baby

 Written by Stephanie WatsonMedically Reviewed by Dan Brennan, MD

Bonding refers to the special attachment that forms between a mother and father and their new baby. That bond is what sends parents rushing into their newborn's room in the middle of the night at the slightest whimper. It's also what makes parents want to instinctively care for and nurture their child.

Sometimes, the bond is immediate -- parents fall in love the instant they set eyes on their little "bundle of joy." Other times, bonding with the baby takes longer. Studies have found that about 20% of new moms and dads feel no real emotional attachment to their newborn in the hours after delivery. Sometimes, it takes weeks or even months to feel that attachment. If you haven't begun bonding with your baby, don't feel anxious or guilty -- it should come with time.

Why Do Parents Bond With Their Baby?

Bonding is an important human instinct that gives babies a sense of security and self-esteem. Bonding also helps parents feel connected to their newest family member. It begins to happen even before the baby is born -- when you feel the first little flutters in your belly or see your baby kick on the ultrasound screen. Your baby also starts getting to know you in the womb through the sound of your voice.

How Does Parent-Baby Bonding Happen?

Bonding happens in many ways. When you look at your newborn, touch their skin, feed them, and care for them, you're bonding. Rocking your baby to sleep or stroking their back can establish your new relationship and make them feel more comfortable. When you gaze at your newborn, they will look back at you. In mothers who are breastfeeding, the baby's cries will stimulate the let-down of milk.

Why Am I Not Bonding With My Baby?

Although bonding can be immediate for some people, others stare at the tiny, bawling creature they have just brought home from the hospital and wonder, "Who is this person?" Don't feel guilty if you aren't bonding with your baby right from the start. Remember that the process sometimes takes time. As you care for your new baby, you may find that your attachment grows. It may not be until the first time your baby shoots you a toothless grin that you suddenly realize you have bonded.

Bonding can be especially difficult if you had a C-section or couldn't see your baby right after the birth. It can also be difficult if your baby was premature and had to spend time in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), or if you adopted the child. It may take longer to bond in these instances, but it eventually should happen.

Some mothers develop postpartum depression, which prevents them from completely bonding with their baby. The pain and exhaustion from childbirth -- especially from a difficult delivery -- can also get in the way of the bonding process.

Sometimes, a mother's or father's situation can affect their relationship with the new baby. Any of the following can interfere with your efforts at bonding:

A childhood that lacked a positive parental role model

A history of depression or mental illness

A past pregnancy loss or loss of a child

Lack of a social network

Life stresses such as a difficult job, unemployment, or other financial troubles.

Marital problems or abuse

Are There Tips for Bonding With My Baby?

Here are some suggestions that will make it easier to bond with your baby:

Ask to room-in with your baby at the hospital. Sleeping in the same room will give you more time to get to know one another.

If your baby is premature, ask the hospital staff if you can touch and hold them. Just talking to your baby can help the two of you bond. Visit the NICU often to see your baby.

Once you get home, spend as much time as possible with your baby by wearing them in a sling or carrier, rocking them on your lap, or singing them a song. Your voice and touch can be very comforting.

Try giving your baby a gentle massage. Research has found that massage can not only improve the relationship between parent and baby, but itcan alson relieve stress in premature infants and ease postpartum depression in the mother. To learn how to massage your baby the right way, get a video, read a book, or take a class at a local hospital.

Try making skin-to-skin contact with your newborn. This practice, called "kangaroo care," is often used in premature babies, but studies are finding that it's also calming to babies born full-term. It not only helps with bonding, but it also can improve your baby's ability to breastfeed.

Dads sometimes have more difficulty bonding with their new baby, especially because they miss out on the direct contact of breastfeeding. Here are some ways to enhance the father-baby bonding experience:

Try to begin bonding with your baby before they are born. Put your hand on your partner's belly to feel the baby kick, go with them to the doctor for prenatal visits, and start thinking about the kind of father you want to be.

Be in the delivery room during the baby's birth and take part in the delivery as much as possible.

Help out with the baby's care: take over a few late-night feedings, give the baby a bath, change diapers, or sing the baby to sleep.

Walk with the baby in a carrier close to your body.

If a few months have passed and you're worried that you still haven't bonded with your baby, talk to your pediatrician. They can determine whether a psychological or health issue may be the cause of the problem.

Sources

Hernandez-Reif, M, Diego, M, and Field T Infant Behavior and Development, 2007.

O'Higgins, M., St. James Roberts, I., Glover, V. Journal of Affective Disorders, 2008.

Lee, H. Taehan Kanho Hakhoe Chi, 2006.

Ferber, S and Makhoul, I. Pediatrics, 2004.

Best Times to Drink Water

 When You Think You’re Hungry

You might really be thirsty. Most people don’t realize they’re actually thirsty when hunger seems to strike. The brain recognizes these triggers as the same. So before you hit the pantry, drink some water first. Then give it a few minutes to see if it satisfies the urge to eat.

When You Wake Up

First thing in the morning is one of the best times to hydrate. Your body has gone through a long fast. For a simple jump start, squirt half a lemon in your first glass of a.m. water for a bright boost of antioxidant phytonutrients, vitamin C, and potassium.

Whenever You Sweat

Anything that makes you sweat -- a sauna or a hot tub, time outside on a hot, muggy day -- will cause your body to lose fluid. Ditto with exercise. As your muscles warm up, your body perspires to cast off heat. You’ll need to cool down with lots of water.

Before, During, and After Exercise

You need lots of water to replace what you sweat out. How much? Before you work out or spend time outside, fill up your bottle with 16 to 20 ounces of H2O. Drink 6 to 12 ounces about every 10-15 minutes while you’re active. Afterward, drink up again -- another 16 to 24 ounces.

When You’re Sick

Hydration is key to healing when you’re sick. Symptoms such as diarrhea, vomiting, and fever can cause extreme water loss. At the first sign of illness, drink lots of water, especially if you’re not hungry. Stay away from alcohol and caffeinated drinks. They’ll dry out your system even more.

When You’re on a Plane

Ever wonder why you get so parched and thirsty when you fly? It’s all about altitude. The higher the plane goes, the drier the cabin air becomes -- and around half the air in your cabin flows in from outside. To combat the super-low humidity level, carry an empty water bottle to fill up as needed during your flight.

When You Get a Massage

Your massage therapist will thank you if you drink water before you hit the table. Your muscles will be softer and more supple, which makes it easier for them to manipulate the tender tissue. This bodywork releases substances you should flush out afterward with plenty of water, too. This is extra important if you have a deep tissue or other heavy-duty massage.

Before Your Period

You can ease premenstrual discomfort and reduce bloating by drinking lots of water before your period, as well as during. One of the biggest causes of cramps or headaches is dehydration. A recent study of young women with dysmenorrhea -- very painful menstruation -- found that drinking more water shortened their cycles, eased pelvic pain, and lessened their need for pain relief.

When You’re in a Midday Slump

It’s midafternoon, and your energy has left the building. Don’t start a new pot of coffee, though. Instead, have a tall glass of water -- maybe sparkling to add some pizzazz -- with lemon or other flavoring to bump up your mood. Your hydration state directly affects your mood, memory, and visual perception, the British Journal of Nutrition reports.

When You Have a Headache

One of the top migraine triggers is dehydration. Some people report that even a slight dip in fluid intake can bring on an intense headache. It can also make you feel fuzzy, and in some cases, even require medical treatment. Especially if you’re migraine-prone, keep a water bottle handy at all times and track your intake. If you feel a twinge coming on, a glass can save your day.

Before Eating a Meal

Drinking water before a meal -- aka “preloading” -- might help you lose weight. A small study tested people who drank 500 milliliters -- that’s a little over 16 ounces -- of tap or bottled water about 30 minutes before mealtimes and throughout the day as they wished. Over 12 weeks, the preloaders lost almost 3 pounds more than those who didn’t follow the protocol.

When You Want to Lose Weight

Water is more than a calorie-free way to help yourself feel full. It may also rev up your metabolism. In one study, 50 girls with extra weight drank about 2 cups of water half an hour before breakfast, lunch, and dinner with no other changes in their diet. After 8 weeks, they lost weight and lowered their body mass index and body composition scores. Water also speeds up lipolysis, your body’s process of burning fat for energy.

When You Need to Be on Your Game

Did you know almost three-fourths of your brain contains fluid? If your levels dip too low, the blood vessels in this organ shrink. This can affect your coordination, short-term memory, attention span, and stamina, a Chinese study found. So if you feel tired and muddled, pass up a caffeine-charged energy drink. Simply drinking water can help you bounce back.

How Much Water Is Best?

The U.S. National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine say more fluid is better for average, healthy adults -- 15.5 cups a day is ideal for men, while 11.5 cups a day from all food and drinks is enough for most women. But this includes hydration from food and all beverage sources. Your own needs depend on your health, how active you are, and the climate where you live. Check with your doctor on how much you need.

Best Exercises for Losing Weight

 Get More Fiber

You don’t have to eat a bag of Grandma’s prunes to get your fiber. Leafy greens, whole grains, nuts, and beans are all good for keeping away the fat that stays deep in your belly. That’s called visceral fat, and it’s the most dangerous kind because it can wrap around major organs, including your liver, pancreas, and kidneys.

Forget These Two Things

There are no “super foods” that burn off visceral fat. And you can’t tone it away with specific moves like crunches. Instead, look for ways to upgrade your eating habits and add activity every day. Think about your average week. Where might you be able to make some changes?

The Best Thing You Can Do

While anyone can have too much visceral fat, it’s more likely if you’ve got a lot of weight to lose. As you start to take those pounds off, it will help your whole body, including belly fat that’s hidden out of your sight.

Be Choosy About Fat

You can still have some! But limit the “saturated” kind that’s in animal foods, coconut and palm oils, and full-fat dairy. Keep the portions of those foods smaller than you might normally do, for instance. And check nutrition labels to see how many calories and how much fat are in a serving. Look for fats that are better for you, too, like those from plant foods or fish such as salmon, tuna, and mackerel that are rich in omega-3s.

Stop Trying to Outrun It

Still trying to “burn off” that belly fat by pounding the pavement for hour upon hour? Research shows that a few quick bursts of high-intensity exercise -- such as a 30-second sprint or intense pullup set -- may be more effective, and easier to fit into your schedule. You can add bursts of higher intensity to any workout. Just speed up or work harder for a brief time, then drop back to a more mellow pace, and repeat.

Sleep: the Goldilocks Formula

When it comes to weight gain, shut-eye is a bit like porridge: Too little -- less than 5 hours -- may mean more belly fat. But too much -- more than 8 hours -- can do that, too. “Just right” seems to be around 6-8 hours. If you don’t sleep that much now, or if you tend to toss and turn, try to go to bed a little earlier, relax before bedtime, keep your bedroom cool, and try not to text and email right before you turn in.

Forget a ‘Quick Fix’

Sorry, but cosmetic surgery isn’t the solution here. Liposuction doesn’t reach inside the abdominal wall. So it can’t get rid of visceral belly fat. Likewise, crash diets aren’t the solution, either. You’re too likely to go off them. The slower, steadier option -- lifestyle changes that you can commit to for a long time -- really is the best bet.

Keep Calm

Are you stressed out? That can make you eat more fat and sugar, and unleash the “stress hormone” cortisol, which can boost belly fat. Stresscan alson make you sleep less, exercise less, and drink more alcohol -- which can add belly fat, too. It’s a great reason to take up meditation, work out, listen to music you love, or find other healthy ways to unwind and relax.

Rethink Your Drink

Whether it’s a latte, a regular soda, a mug of beer, or a glass of wine, it’s got calories. And when you’re trying to unwind the numbers on the scale, water (or a smaller glass of your favorite beverage) might be a better choice. If you drink alcohol, remember that it just might make you throw your willpower out the window when you order your meal, too.

Don’t Smoke

As if you need another reason to quit. Smoking makes you more likely to store fat in your belly, rather than your hips and thighs. And that’s bad. Oh, and it’s also a cause of diabetes. And cancer. And heart disease. And lung disease. And … you get the idea. If you’ve tried before, try again. Tell your doctor, so you can get pointers on what might help you quit for good.

Don’t Rely on Clothing Sizes

One company’s size 14 could be another’s size 12. A better method is to measure your waist. If you’re a woman, you want that number to be 35 inches or less. Men get up to 40 inches. The reason? You may lower your chance of having a heart attack, a stroke, or possibly certain types of cancer. A tape measure can’t check on visceral fat. But along with the scale, it can help you track your weight loss.

Lift Weights

Think about hitting the gym instead of the trail. In one study, healthy middle-aged men who did 20 minutes of daily weight training gained less abdominal fat than men who spent the same time doing aerobic exercises, such as biking. Strength training is also good for women -- and it won’t make you bulky. You still need to do some cardio, but make sure strength training is in the mix.

Best & Worst Dishes for Your Health

 What Makes the Difference?

You’ll want to consider what’s in the dish, how it was cooked, freshness, and the type of fish. There are lots of good choices, but some are better than others. You’ll want to limit cream, oil, salt, “bad” fats, and mercury. Do you know what’s in your seafood entree?

Best: Salmon

It’s a nutritional darling that you’ll see on many U.S. menus. It’s high in healthy omega-3 fatty acids. And as a canned fish, it generally has less mercury than tuna. Wild salmon caught in Alaska is a good source, whether fresh or canned. Because fatty fish like salmon can have more of the banned chemicals called PCBs, it helps if you cut away or drain extra fat, skin, and darker meat.

Worst: Fish and Chips

The fact that everything in this dish is deep-fried is not a good start. The tartar sauce and ketchup often served with it add even more fat, sugar, and calories. If you bake the fish (try it with a cornflake crust for a crunch) and potatoes, you can control the amount of oil. A simple lemon wedge is a low-calorie way to add flavor.

Have Sparingly: Broiled Swordfish

No matter how it’s caught or how you cook it, swordfish is likely to have high levels of mercury. It’s not a big deal to eat once in a while, but too much can damage your brain and kidneys. If you’re pregnant, that may hurt the baby or cause a miscarriage. Infants, the elderly, and those who have weak immune systems may be more sensitive to it. Shark, king mackerel, and tilefish from the Gulf of Mexico also have high levels of mercury.

Best: Shrimp Cocktail

It’s all about the sauce. The shrimp are usually steamed or boiled, which is pretty healthy. They’re high in protein and low in fat and mercury. But the sauce, especially the classic bottled tomato-based type, can hide lots of sugar, sometimes listed as “high-fructose corn syrup.” So skip the dip, or make your own sugar-free version. You’ll find lots of recipes online.

Worst: New England Clam Chowder

Sure, it’s got clams, which give you protein. But this soup also has cream, butter, and salted pork. So you could get lots of calories, saturated fat, and sodium, which many people need to limit. Save this one for a special treat and try not to have too much.

Best: Manhattan Clam Chowder

Instead of butter and cream, this chowder uses a base of tomatoes. That’s a really good start. Potatoes, carrots, and onions fill out the dish. It adds up to about 135 calories a cup with little saturated fat, compared with around 181 calories a cup for the same amount of New England clam chowder. Mercury is not usually a worry with “bivalve” shellfish like mussels, oysters, and clams. Be aware that ready-to-serve soup has an estimated 1000 mg of sodium in 1 cup.

Best: Salad With Anchovies

Because they’re small and don’t live that long, these fish are less likely to have mercury, PCBs, and other chemicals in their flesh. And they’re loaded with omega-3 fatty acids that your body needs to be at its best. Some packaged anchovies have a lot of salt, so check the label, especially if you have to watch your sodium. Look for white anchovies in vinegar -- “boquerones” in Spanish cuisine -- for a less-salty version.

Best: Canned Tuna

This lean fish gives you protein and has some omega-3s. But tuna grow bigger than fish like sardines and anchovies, so they often have more mercury and other chemicals in their flesh. For lower mercury levels, look for the “canned light” kind. If you like albacore, look for products from the U.S. or Canada. If you’re watching your calories and fat, buy tuna packed in water instead of oil.

Best: Oysters

You’ll get protein and zinc, but it’s best to cook oysters, not eat them raw. That will help avoid food poisoning from bacteria like Vibrio. This bacteria is more common in warmer months, but it can happen anytime. Hepatitis A can also be a risk with shellfish. Your oysters may be fine, but you can’t tell ifthey’res infected by how they look and smell. Lemon juice, hot sauce, or alcohol won’t kill Vibrio. Only thorough cooking can do that.

Best: Baked Catfish

They may not be the prettiest fish to look at, but U.S. farm-raised catfish have a lot going for them. They’re low in mercury, eco-friendly, nutritious, and easy to find in grocery stores. You may want to check on the source, since some countries don’t have strict rules about fish farming. Fried catfish is a favorite for many, but frying adds lots of calories and fat. Bake it for a leaner dish.

Best: Grilled Sardines

They’re usually canned, but you can sometimes get fresh ones at the market that are great when grilled whole. They’ve got plenty of omega-3s and not much mercury, because they’re small and short-lived. Plus, there really are lots of these fish in the sea, and they usually aren’t expensive. As with tuna, you can get them packed in water instead of oil.

Best: Ceviche

Made with raw fish, lime juice, and often potatoes and onions, this is a traditional dish from Latin America. The acid in the lime juice may seem to “cook” it because the flesh changes color. A week in the freezer at -4 F usually gets rid of parasites that could make you sick. But the size and type of fish also make a difference, so let a chef make your ceviche.

Have Sparingly: Sushi

It can be good for you, with lean protein, omega-3s, and not a lot of fat, sugar, and calories. But there are some drawbacks. Raw fish needs expert handling. Bacteria and parasites don’t get cooked away, but a good chef knows how to keep you safe. And mercury in common sushi fish like ahi and bluefin tuna can start to add up if you eat too much.

If You’re Cooking

When you’re at the market, seafood shouldn’t smell fishy. And if you can see the fish’s eyes, they should be clear. If the bones are a problem, you can buy fillets. Experts recommend that you cook fish until it flakes easily with a fork. You can cook it many ways: roast, bake, grill, or steam, to name a few. There are many recipes to try, so cast a broad net!

19 Reasons Women Wish You Knew

 A Caring Guy Is a Hot Guy

What do women want? For those who've ever pondered this question, here are 19 relationship secrets. They're based on the study of healthy, happy couples and our changing gender roles. Secret No. 1: Women appreciate a guy with a sensitive side, especially when they're upset. Put your arm around them and hand them a tissue. Nurturing is a powerful way to connect.

Chivalry Still Has a Place

When it comes to romance, many women do like men to take a traditional masculine role. This is especially true in the wooing stage of a relationship, according to psychologist Diana Kirschner, PhD, who has written several books about love. They are perfectly capable of pulling out their own chair or opening a door, but if you see them hesitate, they might just be waiting for you to be the gentleman.

Dress to Impress

Styles come and go, but men's attention to their grooming and clothing should be long-lasting. It's important for women from the first flirtation through the honeymoon and beyond. "You've got to figure out if there's a certain look that she likes," says Kirschner. "If she likes a guy in tight jeans, you wear tight jeans."

Guy Wears Red, Guy Gets Girl

OK, this tip doesn't come from women, but from clever testing by psychologists of women's subconscious preferences. One intriguing study found that the color red made men seem more powerful, attractive, and sexually desirable to women. There's a caveat, though. Red doesn't make guys appear nicer or kinder. That part is up to you.

Don't Hide Your Flaws

Nothing captures a woman's heart quite like a good man who wants to be a better man, according to love guru Kirschner. "Women love personal growth; they love a man who is thoughtful and sensitive." They like it when their men recognize a flaw -- a short temper, for example, or a regularly sullen mood after work -- and love it when they make an effort to address it.

Don't Try to Fix Their World

When something's bothering them, they want your ear, not your advice. "Men feel the need to fix things because they are solution-oriented," says Kirschner. "But to a woman, really listening is a wonderful, wonderful thing that deepens the relationship."

Nodding Is Not Enough

Listening is important, but they also want to know that they are being heard. Nodding along won't cut it. When she pauses, she's giving you a cue to respond in a compassionate, caring way, says Kirschner. If they tell you that they are upset because their boss gave them a tough time, they want to hear you say, "I'm sorry that work was such a drag for you today." And remember: Resist the urge to offer solutions.

Date No. 3 Is Not a Bedroom Key

The three dates before sex rule is an urban legend. Women don't set a timeline on when they'll invite a potential partner into the bedroom. Some women will want to have many dates before sex. A good rule of thumb is to give the relationship at least two months to grow before entering the sexual arena.

Women Like the Slow Lane

Guys often want to take the quickest path to sex. But many women prefer the scenic route. "Women want sex, but they get to itdifferentlyy," says psychologist Kirschner, who has helped hundreds of couples achieve a more rewarding relationship. "They want to feel connected and understood, they want to be romanced." That means time and talking and touching -- in other words, foreplay.

Safe Sex Is a Turn-On

This is something both of you need to focus on, but Kirschner says that women appreciate it and feel more protected when the guy makes it clear that it's a concern to him -- and then shows her that he practices what he preaches.

Learn What They Want in Bed

Women do like to talk about what's going on in the sack, and they want to please their man -- and a tactful approach is often best. Ask them what they like. Be sure to ask for what you want in a positive and validating way. Kirschner advises saying something along the lines of, "I would really love it if you [fill in the blanks]."

Performance Anxiety Is Shared

When you have an off night and can't perform, they feel bad, too. They might worry that they no longer turn you on, and they will want assurance that that is not true. They will want to talk about what's going on and what you are doing about it, especially if it's a recurring problem. "It's a touchy thing for both of you," says Kirschner, "but talking about it is a plus."

Mirroring Is a Barometer of Love

Remember the saying "imitation is the highest form of flattery"? A woman often conveys how they feel about you by mirroring your moods and moves. They may order a meal that pairs with yours, wear your favorite color, or smile or cross their arms when you do. Mimicking is their way of putting you at ease and letting you know they are charmed.

Your Shirt May Be a Love Magnet

Does your partner curl up in your sweater or sneak into your work shirt? Some researchers have found that the scent of a man's perspiration has a relaxing effect on women.

Say It, Again and Again

Women like to be told they look nice, and they like a man who notices without being told. When they are wearing a sexy new dress, for example, they'll give you major points for saying how hot they look, especially if you mention the dress before they do. If they are looking particularly attractive, if they have a new haircut, if they are looking more fit -- let them hear about it.

Don't Fear the Relationship Talk

When your woman wants to talk about the relationship, it doesn't mean you did something wrong (well, not necessarily). Kirschner says that many women like to talk about the "state of the union" -- what's going right, what's going wrong, or simply what's going on. This is a good thing. An honest, wide-ranging talk can bring the two of you closer.

Look Your Partner in the Eye

You may feel more comfortable sitting side by side, but many women prefer face time -- and we don't mean the latest mobile video chat technology. Kirschner says that women prefer their men to make eye contact with them as they're talking. And looking her in the eye during sex will deepen the relationship outside the bedroom.

Don't Miss the Moment

How do you know if they are ready to commit? They'll say so. This is something that women are often quite up front about. But they don't want to have "the talk" too often. If they are ready and they have given you time, the next time the subject comes up, be prepared to step up or step off.

Romance Is Simple; Keep It Coming

Romance is something they will always want, whether you've been together two months or 20 years. Flowers, an intimate dinner, a few lines of love poetry -- don't worry, they don't have to be your own -- might sound cliché, but Kirschner insists that most women appreciate such simple romantic gestures and often show their appreciation after the lights go down.